I have used the word nemesis to describe either a person in my life who has challenged me intensely or a particular physical skill that I cannot yet conquer.
Each year I seem to come across a new nemesis-person. Sometimes my nemesis has been myself. My nemesis is always someone who makes me feel uncomfortable to be around…someone who I feel is competing with me intentionally…someone who makes me look up to the sky and say, “Please, get them out of my life!”
The dictionary definition of nemesis is: something that a person cannot conquer, achieve, etc.; an opponent or rival whom a person cannot best or overcome; an agent or act of retribution or punishment.
It hasn’t been until recently after reading, “The Synchronicity Key,” by David Wilcock, that I realized, I too can be the nemesis-person of my nemesis!
Ok, I KNOW I do not intentionally try to bring grief, conflict, or competition to others, but perhaps to some people I have crossed paths with, I have come off this way.
Who is your nemesis right now? Is this the person who lives rent-free in your brain and eats away at you at night? Is this the person you feel has crossed you negatively and you are holding a massive grudge with?
As I reflect back on the last several years of my life, my biggest nemesis was a male I encountered in my corporate fitness days. His actions tested my patience as he was ruthless and liked to play dirty. After struggling to find a truce with this man, the Universe stepped in. At the time it appeared that I had let him win and gain power over me. It seemed that I had let him crush my corporate wellness company that my business partner and I had built with our heart and soul. We fought hard to keep our company alive, but he defeated us. After building a female-owned and operated corporate wellness company of three years, in one day, one man, ripped it right out of our hands and took with it our employees.
For almost a year after that experience, I was lost. I grew extremely depressed. Where was Karma when I needed her? How in this day and age could this have happened to someone like me?! I built my company on truth, trust, and integrity. I thought, “I am good – I will prevail. He will get what is coming to him and I will sit back and grin with satisfaction.”
But after a year, that day never came. I realized, that I HAD to let go of the actions he unleased on me and my partner if I was going to move ahead with my life.
So, I got knocked down – hard. I lived for months in spite and dreamed of revenge…I actually had reoccurring dreams that were very symbolic of how repulsed I was with his behavior over what he had taken from me. My dreams became so vivid and nearly every night I dreamt that I was violently throwing up and I couldn’t stop. I would wake up in the middle of the night nauseas and sometimes crying.
Then one day I FINALLY said, “Enough!” I realized, this man was sleeping JUST FINE. He was not concerned with his past actions and he definitely was not concerned about me. What was I DOING? I HAD to forgive him…as gross and impossible as this sounded to me…I just had to.
So, now I ask myself the question, “Was I HIS nemesis?” Was this why he wanted me OUT and my business to crumble? He was a very sexist person (I’m being honest) and in his eyes I was the epitome of the word feminist. Perhaps because I would not play his games and join his “team” – I was his nemesis. Doesn’t make it right, but I would like to view my situation as the scene from the movie, “Alien.” Both Sigourney Weaver and the Alien thought they were right – yes, the big, scary Alien just wanted to live its life and reproduce! They both wanted to live in the same world. But alas, they could not.
Fast forward to present day. I now have a new nemesis-person…happens every year. I am taking it as a sign for me to learn from. A sign that although this person is nowhere near as aggressive or vile as the Alien I dealt with years ago, I must learn how to behave differently in order to grow stronger and survive the nemesis. This person has tested my patience and has indeed made me very uncomfortable during various encounters. But now, I do not engage my nemesis with trying to live in the same world. I will acknowledge my nemesis from a far and be amicable during closer interactions. However, I will not take the bait this time for the nemesis to destroy me. Instead I have allowed my new nemesis to help drive and motivate me from a distance. My nemesis actually has pushed me towards goals I have been longing to obtain and it has helped me grow tremendously. Perhaps I have done the same for this person.
My take away message is this: for every person who pisses you off, you can be doing the same them! In your mind, you are right…in their mind, they are right. The difference between you and your nemesis is this – YOU KNOW that you BOTH are right. And in my opinion this will free your mind and spirit and lead YOU to the path of forgiveness, success, and to a higher good.